Learnings is where I attempt to make sense of what I am doing, seeing, practicing throughout the month (among other verbs). It’s a place for all the ways I’m learning even when I don’t call it that.
Change? For spring? Groundbreaking.
Trying to be a little bit sillier this time around, read on for why.
I’ve recently been trying to improve my posture — certain exercises each day to reverse a lifetime of leaning towards a mesmerizing screen. At one point I needed to let my shoulder protract or sort of fall forward and I realized that somewhere along the way someone had vilified that motion for me. My body was almost afraid to do it. I can’t pinpoint where, though training as a ballet dancer is likely the culprit with all its fear mongering as the way to gracefulness.
This experience made me think: what other postures do I hesitate to take? How am I afraid to move? To shift?
And before I start to pathologize that hesitation, categorize the fear as good or bad… I pause and remember what one of my movement instructors, Kara Duval, often says. “Check in with your nervous system” or “maybe your nervous system will soften” as we try out different ways of moving the body. It’s a reminder that the result of forced change, physical or otherwise, is often injury.
Sometimes it isn’t us that needs to change, it is the system around us. Maybe you’re not lazy, you’re unmotivated by the task that someone else outlined for you and need to insert some autonomy. Do it your way. Maybe you’re not disorganized, you just haven’t found the right organization structure for you yet. Or maybe, like me, you’re hiding — the part of you needed is there you just aren’t used to calling it forward.
One of the ways I hesitate to move is sharing the silly side of myself. I prefer to be seen as smart. Smart is safe. So much so that I once went on a trip with a friend and when I went along the bit and got all together goofy, she was surprised. And I share that story with a sort of can you believe that?! But, you probably can (unless you’re one of my sisters). So, here I am, taking a playful and succinct approach to my learnings for March. I want you to see me be silly! And I would love it if you joined in.
So my question for you is, dear ever-changing reader, where are you holding back? What are the parts of you we don’t get to see? Is that on purpose or was it scared into you? What “postures” do you hesitate to own? How do you want to change—or better yet metamorphosize—this spring? Okay, that was five questions. You can rely on me to be curious!
PRACTICING
In an attempt to lean into the silly I am playing with new mediums! In March I baked family recipes, mocked up pearl bracelets with a jeweler friend, planned a dinner party table scape, and made my first ever IRL mood board. All creative endeavors and all chances to learn new things about my practice.
In April, I’m participating in Escapril with two different writing groups. One poem per day for 30 days! You know I love a challenge. So far, so good — I’ve written 5 poems in 5 days. Updates (and a few poems) in next month’s learnings.
![](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_720,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa4c74ba2-3c9a-432a-90fc-c000d50a3713_1080x1080.png)
![](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_720,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F759420a9-821c-4fdd-a30d-5efea85d3f81_1080x1080.png)
![](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_720,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd80ff6d0-4940-40f4-856c-2e34cac7238b_1080x1080.png)
![](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_720,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3b1b09c8-0c7e-4ec7-ab12-f33ff3d1635a_1080x1080.png)
LISTENING
In the spring I want to be listening to any song that feels like it belongs on a movie soundtrack. Here’s a playlist that fits the vibe:
I’m convinced that “make your own kind of music” turned all the way up is the ultimate Aries season bop. Hope that doesn’t give you the ick.
Leaving you with a meme because it simply is not that deep and I want you to go dance!